That AWKWARD moment: the solutions

Hello again, you crazy, desperate people! Wait...were you desperate to read this post, weren't you?! 'cause you totally should be! Well...moving on, I will present you all that you've been waiting for so long: the solutions for those five AWKWARD moments I described erarlier. Anxious? Desperate? Ok, Filipa, just get it started!

1 – In those awkward moments...the best thisng to do is really not making up stupid excuses, or you'll look like a fool! Accept that the person heard what you said and you can't erase it...so, you better appologize or tell her/ him the reasons you had to say what you've said...then, you'll become friends forever or you'll never talk again...(this last option is the most likely, btw).

2 - In those awkward moments...first of all, you should go to the bathroom after you eat, so you can check your teeth in the mirror or even download the toothpict (an app for your iPhone that allows you to know if you have something in your teeth)! But, if you don't, and all that happens, you should totally laugh about it, 'cause we must admit that it can't be changed: yes, that green thing has been there during all the party and you've smiled very often...you should comment it with you're friends and make fun of yourself like you didn't care...and, about the photos on Facebook, well...you must hope that whoever has put them in there, take them back when you ask!

3 - In those awkward moments...(which, btw, often happen to me when I'm wearing high heels) I'm not really sure what to do, but I will tell you what I usually do: once, I avoided looking at the driver and continued walking has if nothing had happen and then laughed as hell alone (I hope no one has seen me laughing, otherwise it was a double humiliation!)...other time, I started laughing in the middle of the crosswalk and then looked at the driver, and appologized. This are not the best solutions, I admit, but if we didn't laugh at ourselves, life would be terribly boring!

4 - In those awkward moments...you better pray for the other guests to feel the same way as you feel, and hope that some of them save you by saying something about it...otherwise, you'll just have to say you're allergic to some ingredient in that dish (you better be sure that it is one of the ingredients of the recipe...or you'll go through the biggest humiliation ever!!)

5 - In those awkward moments...(I get red as a tomato!) If you're faced with a situation like that, you should look around and see if someone near you is waving back. Then, you'll realize that it has nothing to do with you...but, if you see nobody waving back you have two options: you wave back and later, if you see you dind't know that person, you take a “pill of guts” and say “excuse me, were you waving at me? No, oh, I'm sorry then”. The other option is not waving back and then, if you see the person closer and you actually didn't knew her, you'll thank that you didn't wave back. But, if you realize you knew her, the only solution is to say “oh, were you waving at me? I'm sorry, I'm myopic and I couldn't recognize you”. And that's it, easy.

Well, I guess it's time to say goodbye. I hope all this solutions have been helpful for your daily life and I also hope you've spent a great time reading my wise (or maybe not) words!

XOXO, Oh My Gossip!,

Filipa

Those wonderful 12 steps!

Hello againnn! I really expect that you were anxious to know those magic secrets of washing hands!!!

So, here they are, “How we should wash hands?”:

The first step is misteriously assigned the number zero: “wet the hands with water”. It is, of course, a previous moment in the relation with the act of washing hands, but it's astonishing that it has not been recognised suficient dignity to allocated it a natural number.

The step which is really named as number one (step one) is: “Apply soap to cover all surfaces of the hands” and the disgrace begins!

For the ones who have ever soaped hands...you shall all feel the humiliation of having never apllied soap!! The instruction finds in language a cruel degree diferentiation of neatness: who knows how to wash hands apllysoap; the pigs soap.

In step 2: “Rub your palms in one another” - there is a recommendation accompanied by an illustration with two hands rubbing in one another in an circular and opposed movement to the clockwise ( Who has always rubbed hands in an opposed movement to this one, like me, wasted all his life in terms of personal hygiene)!

The following steps explain the same, although in a less “scandalous” way: "rub the right palm on the back of the left, with fingers interlaced, and vice versa"; "palm to palm with fingers interlaced"; and the fifth step advises us to rub the "back of fingers on opposing palms with fingers entwined". From this point, it just keeps getting worse...

The sixth step: "rub the left thumb in a rotational direction, interlaced in the right palm and vice versa" in movements similar to those made when accelerating a scooter.

Step number seven recommends "rub alternately back and forth fingers of the right hand in left palm and vice versa". The care put in these points humbles whoever merely rubs his hands together, neglecting the role of hygiene in turnover.

"Rinse out your hands" is the step number eight, and number nine is "Dry hands with disposable towel".

But the tenth step reveals that the process is complex: "Use the towel to turn off the tap if it is manually operated."... Therefore, the tap must continue to run during step nine...such an OBVIOUS form of savings!

The eleventh step is the most interesting: "Now your hands are clean and safe".

Sooo.. we can conclude that the contemplation of cleanliness and safety of the hands is therefore a separate step in this process of manual washing...After washing, with your hands spotlessly clean (and safe), you'll leave the bathroom, opening the door by its handle where everyone puts their hands!

So beautiful, this manner of washing hands, don't you think?! I hope this Christmas you applly all the steps in your hygiene methods! So, a very good Christmas and a prosperous new year my pumpkins!

XOXO, Oh My Gossip!,

Sara Costa

That AWKWARD moment!

Hello, hello! I've decided to present you today with a text a little bit different than usual...BUT, I'm absolutely sure it will be usefull in your daily life! I'm going to write about those moments we all experience and which make our cheeks turn RED! Later, I'll tell you how to get rid of those moments or, at least, how to surpass them...let's get it started:

1 - That awkward moment...when you're gossiping (as a loyal follower to our lovely blog) with a group of friends about that awfull outfit someone has worn that thay and then you start laughing as hell and hear zero laughing from your fellows...their silence makes you look around and realize that the person you were talking about has just arrived and heard all (or the major part) of what you've said...red cheeks and stupid excuses begin their mission...

2 – That awkward moment...when you're at a party having sooo much fun, laughing out loud, talking to everybody, dancing, singing, and all those fun stuff and then it comes the hour to return home...when you truly arrive home, you look yourself in the mirror and realize you have had ALL THE TIME a bit of some green thing between your front teeth! OMG, worst thing ever! This is the moment when you start regreting every photo you've taken with a big smile on your face at that party...and which will certainly be on Facebook the next day...

3 – That awkward moment...when you're passing through the crosswalk and stupidly stumble and almost fall on the ground (I don't even mention those times you actually fall!)...the problem is right in the fact that someone in the car waiting is watching you attentively...after all, he/ she has just stopped the car for you to pass and is expecting you to speed!

4 – That awkward moment...when you're invited to a lunch/ dinner at some friend's house and all the food looks and smells amazing, BUT...when you first taste it, it's just disgusting! What can you possibly do? This is one of the most feared moments in the world, especially if you don't know the family/ friends for a long time...

5 – That awkward moment...when you look far away and see someone waving effusively. That's the moment your brain functions beyond quickly: “OMG, is it for me?”, “OMG, do I know that person?”, “OMG, if it is for me and I don't wave back he/ she will think I'm rude!”, etc, etc, etc...finally: you'll either wave back and you realize you've never seen that person OR you won't wave back and you'll be seen as impolite if you actually know the person wavig...

Does any of this situations sound familiar to you? I bet some do...I admit I might be seriously related with some (or the major part) of them, btw...guilty! Now, you'll just have to wait patiently for the solutions to each one of this situations...In the next post, I PROMISSE I will surprise you! And when I promisse something, I fulfill it!

XOXO, Oh My Gossip!,

Filipa

Public bathrooms: just the beginning

Hello, my dear dear followers (teacher Helena, I mean) ! Have you missed me ?

So, I will begin to talk about sth that, in a first way, can be suspicious...And that is...

PUBLIC BATHROOMS ( tchannan!!) ! And this happens because yesterday I went into a “very beautiful” bathroom and, for the first time, I've watched with reallyy reallyy good eyes to that kind of “bath-literature”, which, most of the time, is neglected, and I realized that it is increasingly sophisticated. Now, they even have the significative state patronage.

This brochure was truly disquieting, begining with the title: “How we should wash hands?”

The text started to be completely masterful in the way that manipulated my arrogance to, in one hand, a completely laughter ( one laughter that very quickly turned into sth “acid”, because, in a few seconds, I was in an excited mode because they were trying to teach me sth that I've known for a long time), and, in the other hand, I was astoundingly invated for a feeling that I HAVE NEVER HAD MY HANDS WASHED!

The brochure presented us a good plan for washing hands in 12 steps, including sterilization manners which I've never, ever, dreamed of!

There's NO doubt: we were face to face with some hands' desinfectation bible! This guide, detailed and rigorous, doesn't even leave one single“phalanx” to be purified. But this is terrible, because it rubs in our faces, our present and past's filthiness.

So, after this introduction, is anyone intrigated about the 12 steps ? Oh, forget it! This is me trying to be simpathic.. 'cause, and this is for you teatcher, you will read this any way!

But the content of this theme stands for the next post, because...GUESS WHAT: I've gotta go to the bathroom and...please wish me luck for my new method of washing hands ( I´m almost so nervous, as when I'm about to have an exam).

XOXO, Oh My Gossip!,

Sara Costa